You know how people often make bucket lists, those things they want to do before they die? Well, I’m jumping on that other bandwagon and writing a list of things I won’t mind missing out on. Maybe I’d still end up doing some of them someday but for now, I’m perfectly happy even if they don’t come to pass in my lifetime.
1. Go skydiving. If you’re going to make me do it, then you better push me off the plane because there’s no way in hell I’m going to jump on my own unless the pilots are dead and the engine is on fire.
2. Climb Mt. Everest. An Everest climb costs around $35,000 excluding plane fare and all the gear you’ll need so you won’t die of frostbite. With all that money, I could go on so many other climbs in the Philippines and around the world. I get it; it’s Mt. Everest, the highest mountain on earth. If I win the lottery or rich, crazy people are willing to foot the bill, then why not? Until then, I’m good with more affordable but still very rewarding climbs. (Of course, there’s also the more important consideration of whether I could actually survive an Everest climb. The mortality rate of climbing the world’s highest peak is at 10 percent. I’m not too keen on joining that statistic.)
3. Run a marathon. I could walk for hours on rough, uphill terrain but please don’t make me run for long distances on a flat, paved road. I will shrivel and collapse on the pavement. Even a three-kilometer run leaves me in a half-dead state.
4. Run with bulls. There’s this insane festival in Pamplona, Spain where people wear white and run in front of bulls. A group of female bloggers even thought it was a great idea to go there and join in on the fun. All I can say is hats off to them and better them than me. I don’t like running (as you may have gleaned from number 3). I like enraged bulls on the loose even less.
5. Get a tattoo. I have a low tolerance for pain and I bruise easily. I can understand body art but I’m not willing to suffer for it. And my parents will kill me.
6. Learn a sport that uses a ball. The thing with a ball is it’s bouncy and it’s a pain in the ass to chase after bouncy things. It also tends to hit you in the face.
7. Go free-diving. It’s underwater diving for people who hate air. I happen to like air and breathing, thank you very much.
8. Get my nails done. This is going to make me sound like a freak (and yes, I am in fact a freak) but I’ve never had anyone else mess with my nails (except for my mother who had to trim them when I was still too young to use a nail cutter). I find it creepy that another person with a sharp object would have control over my fingers and toes. It’s one of those irrational things I can’t explain, like my hatred for marshmallows. I probably need therapy.
9. Go to a rock concert. I’ve had my share of rock concerts in college. I didn’t really enjoy them that much but it was one of those things a 17-year-old had to do to appear cool. I’ve now come to terms with the fact that I’m a dork and that’s okay. Also, I love my eardrums and I’m no good as a groupie.
10. Go back to Boracay. Too crowded, too noisy, too filthy. I’ve been there once and I vowed never to go back.
What’s your anti-bucket list?